kicking and screaming to lunch

Unbeknownst to me, the venue for this past Thursday’s lunch was chosen for us by those who were paying. Guess that’s fair. However, it happened to be the same day on which I was to perform in a choir, and so was expected to stand in close proximity to several fond acquaintances, with whom I, of necessity, must interact with in the future.

As a result of my experiences at that restaurant and for the subsequent 24 hours, I propose a new, mandatory scale to be posted prominently in all restaurant windows and menus:

The Four Levels of Garlic
1. mmm, garlic
2. do you have any more gum?
3. sorry, I didn’t catch that – you’re standing a little far away
4. night terrors

Guess which level the local Greek restaurant serves??

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