Buy stocks in (and of) tissues. And twist ties. Really big twist ties.

At the decision of my physician who was, no doubt, non-plussed to constantly read of my suspected latex sensitivity, I saw an allergist a few days ago for the standard stab-you-in-the-arm test.

Now, to be fair, my suspicions were not far-fetched. During my practicum – many, many years ago – I developed awful skin reactions to latex gloves and was unable to find a brand that was okay. Vinyl and nitrile gloves were completely fine. So, even though my reactions were still quite possibly due to powders or other non-latex components, I went with being better safe than sorry. I went with “sensitivity to latex – nothing anaphylactic”. And that is the story I have stuck with since, without incident or much backlash.

But, now, my doc felt it best to confirm instead of running around with only rampant “suspicions”. So off to the specialist I went. This specialist – in his infinite wisdom, thoroughness or just boredom – not only tested me for latex allergies, but a whole host of allergens that have made any suspected appearance on my past.

Things I’ve Learned as a result of this appointment

  • Good news: I am not allergic to latex.
  • New news: dust mites are a bitch. …or, bitches, I guess.
  • Old news: I am still rather allergic to grasses.
  • Old news that I thought was long gone and buried: I am still allergic to cats.

monopoly cat

Don’t tell this one, who doesn’t actually bother me [allergy wise] in the slightest. She won’t care, at best, but at worst may decide to stalk me even more…

Despite the fact that I seem totally allergy-less around her, I did take a closer look at her fishing-pole style toys that did not involve handling something that has been in her mouth when she was hankering for some attention. We played a bit. She got bored. My arm got tired. We parted ways and I started opening a set of travel mugs I just purchased. As with all new things now, they were secured in their box with some rather substantial twist ties.

Forget catnip infused toy mice and feathered toy birds. Almost forget [but not quite] milk bottle rings. It’s official: giant black twist ties are the new cat coke. She stared at them. She reached out for them, almost unbelieving that they could be so close within her grasp. And then, my darling little cat pounced on the poor unsuspecting ties with a vengeance reserved for a particularly drunken Housewives episode. And she Would.Not.Give.Them.Up.

Which can only lead me to believe that, before she came to live with us, my cat’s diet consisted of a lot of spruce beetles.


The audible sounds of these gigantic buggers landing on the house or lawn chair next to you on a late summer afternoon is enough to send anyone running, were they not paralyzed in fear. My cat is clearly far braver than the average hypothetical northern-BC tween. [or, um, so I’ve heard…]

So, to accommodate for both my in-denial allergies and my cat’s not in-denial antennae fetish, I have created the most awesome cat toy ever.

spruce mouse

I hereby present to you the Spruce Mouse. Patents pending.

Maybe lawsuits, too.

3 responses to “Buy stocks in (and of) tissues. And twist ties. Really big twist ties.

  1. lol i am glad that you are not allergic to latex.. I was until I got pregnant with my daughter..(one of the reasons I did get pregnant) the burning it creating made me want to scream for days… (i knew i was allergic by then) When I was training to be a lifeguard they gave us latex gloves and I threw one on and my hand instantly started burning and itching I couldn’t figure it out.. so I took it off dipped it in the water put it back on again burning.. well I told my boss this he gave me nytrle gloves no more burning.. so we figured out latex was my problem.. So lucky you.. and well me too now i can blow up balloons :p. The kitty is adorable 🙂

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